Mother's Day can be a beautiful occasion for celebrating the love and support of mothers and mother figures. However, for those who have experienced the loss of their mother, mother figure, or the loss of a child, the day can bring a mix of emotions. It can be a stark reminder that we no longer have the presence of the person who gave us life, parented us, or made us a mother ourselves.
So what can we do to prepare for this day that can bring a myriad of emotions?
Honouring Memories
Find a way to honour your mother, mother figure, or child. This could be visiting their grave site, visiting a favourite place you used to spend time together at, lighting a candle, or any other way you feel honours them.
Embrace the Complexity of Emotions
Remember to be kind to yourself. It's ok to feel sadness, anger, nostalgia. Your feelings are completely valid so be gentle with yourself.
Connect with Others
Our social connections are so important all throughout our lives, especially in times of adversity. Reach out to friends, family or support groups who have been a part of your journey. Sharing memories and stories about your loved one can help to feel more connected to them.
Focus on Self-Care
Make sure to prioritize yourself on this day and do things that bring you comfort. This could be meditation, a bath, getting out in nature or other activities that help your mind, body and soul feel at peace.
Give Yourself Permission to Opt-Out
You may have a plan for the day and an idea of how you want to spend the day, only to wake up not wanting to do any of those things. Recognizing that and giving yourself the right to not stick to the plan does not have any relation to how much you love your mother, mother figure, or child. Do what feels right for you at the moment.
Mother's Day after the loss of a mother, mother figure, or a child can be a bittersweet reminder of love and loss. It can be a day filled with memories, emotions, and reflections. By honouring your loved ones memories, embracing the mix of emotions, connecting with others and sharing memories, focusing on self-care, and giving yourself permission to opt out, you can navigate this day with grace and gratitude for the time you had with them. Remember that the love and influence our loved ones have on us will forever live in our hearts. May you forever carry the legacy of your loved ones and find solace in the cherished memories you hold so dear.
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